Thursday Confessional-1st Commandment Edition: Let Go or Be Dragged
My shallow breathing is evidence of lack of trust in God. When we breathe in a shallow way, the body remains in a cyclical state of stress—our stress causing shallow breathing and our shallow breathing causing stress.
2019 is the year of my restoration to intended use as Designed by my Creator. Aligned with my gifts, attuned to hear and be led. My One Word is...
Having finally begun understanding whom I was in God, I began changing. Eviscerated, ground to fine dust, demolished beyond recognition, with nothing more than the salt from my own tears, I shed like an old skin the shards of what was. There was no more of me. And in the absence, after so many years, there was finally room for God. It was the time of my EVOLUTION. Evolution, however, was not the end of the story. The rest of the story will be told in the revelation of my 2019 One Word.
I have been struggling. It's not new, certainly not unique, and I will find myself here again. Caregiving is the way we love those we love. We give because we can. We give because we must. We give because the health and welfare of those we love is as important as our own. It is …
I am a mess,
and I will be a mess.
And yet, He loves me, deeply. Fully, with clear eyes and total commitment.
I am comfortable with Maya Angelou’s characterization Father/Mother/God for several reasons, not the least of which is that some days I need a Father Figure, others the Compassion of a fierce and Omnipotent Mother, and other days when it does not matter.
God is so much bigger than any box we could conceive.
Some of us are so pressed down right now we cannot breathe, let alone pray. Even the act of opening one's mouth to pray brings tears and sobs choked in the throat. These are the prayer requests marked urgent. Some of them are so desperate that they cannot be uttered. Do not withhold your mercy …
The sad reality about America the Beautiful is that we are divided.
Until we address the pain American racism continues to cause, to ignore it, particularly in the wake of such carnage, and in a church no less is, as Jon Stewart so beautifully put it, is to ignore "the nexus of a just gaping racial wound that will not heal, yet we pretend doesn’t exist."
I am growing, but like my beloved Granny, I was not on the Peacemaker line for long as they handed out spiritual gifts. I got impatient and left. A sistah had a lot to do.